Hoping to Remember
by ElizabethStarCrystal
Summary: Summary: Day after day I tried to push through the agonizing pain. Him leaving was the worst pain I'd ever felt. My heart had been ripped out and taken with him...Wherever he is. Desperate to hold on to my memories of him, I found our beloved meadow, where the fiery haired devil herself found me. Ironic isn't it? The place I came to find my memories, will be the place I loose them.
1. Chapter 1

**Hoping to Remember**  
Summary: Day after day I tried to push through the agonizing pain. _Him _leaving was the worst pain I'd ever felt. My heart had been ripped out and taken with him...Wherever he is. Desperate to hold on to my memories of him, I found our beloved meadow, where the fiery haired devil herself found me. Ironic isn't it? The place I came to find me memories, will be the place I loose them.  
**Disclaimer: **All characters and this story belongs to Stephenie Meyer. Not me:(  
**(A/N) **This is my first fanfiction ever! Please review and tell me what you think. If theres any way you think I can Improve the story PLEASE tell me! But nicely though:)

**Chapter 1: B.P.O.V **

_Previously..._

"Bella, we're leaving," My brows furrowed, not understanding.  
"Why now? Another year-"  
"Bella it's time. How much longer could we stay in Forks, after all? Carlisle can barely pass for thirty, and he's claiming thirty-three now. We'd have to start over soon regardless."  
His answer confuse me. A small, painful light-bulb went off in my head as my stomach rolled.  
"When you say _we_-," I whispered.  
"I mean my family and myself." Each word hung in the forest air. I shook my head in disbelief .  
"I'll come with you." I said.  
"You can't, Bella. Where we're going... It's not the right place for you."  
"Where you are is the right for me."  
"Don't be ridiculous." He replied unemotionally. I wanted to sound angry, but instead it sounded like I was begging. "You're the very best part of my life."

"My world is not for you," he said grimly.  
"What happened with Jasper- that was nothing Edward! Nothing!  
"You're right," he agreed. "It was to be expected."  
"You promised! In Phoenix, you promised that you would stay-"  
"As long as it was best for you," he interrupted to correct me.  
"_No!_ This is about my soul, isn't it?" I shouted, furious the words exploding out of me- somehow it still sounded like a plea. "Carlisle told me about that, and I don't care, Edward! I don't care! You can have my soul! I don't want it without you- it's yours already!"  
He took a deep breath and stared , unseeingly at the ground for a long moment. His mouth twisted the tiniest bit. When he finally looked up, his eyes were different, harder- like the liquid gold had frozen solid.  
"Bella, I don't want you to come with me," he sighed. The words turned and twisted in my head.  
"You...don't...want me?" I spoke the words he meant. I pleaded for him to take me back, to not mean what he had just said.

But nothing worked. I felt like my legs had turned to jello.  
He smiled gently. "Don't worry. You're human- your memory is no more than sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind..."  
(**A/N) sorry I had to shorten it. I never noticed that them breaking up was like 5 pages longggg.) **

_6 months later..._  
It is now spring. It's been 6 months since he left me stranded in those trees, heartbroken. For weeks after I wouldn't eat, sleep, drink, or talk. I would just stare blankly at the wall. My dad eventually called my mom. She came to Forks and started packing my things insisting I was going to go to Florida with her. That's when I lost it. I threw things, I screamed, I cried, there was no way anyone was taking me out of Forks. I eventually calmed down enough to convince them to let me stay. I went back to school, got a job and came home and did chores. Nothing else. school-job-home.

My friends stopped calling. After weeks they stopped talking to me to. I sat alone at lunch. My life was a simple routine. I was very thin to begin with and now and since _he_ left I've lost even more weight. But I still couldn't stop loving him. Which brings me to where I am today. After weeks of searching I found The Meadow. I looked around as tears gathered in my eyes. Everything was dead, the flowers, the grass, _everything. _My feet were standing on a giant patch of dirt and nothing more. The occasional tuft of yellow grass poked through the brown floor. The hole in my chest became unbearable as I cried and the memories of him broke through like a flood. My knees buckled and I curled into the fetal position, hugging my knees to my chest praying for the pain to stop. Thats when I heard her...  
"Aw, poor wittle human. Where's your owner?" The snake like voice taunted. I quickly looked up to see her wicked smile and pitch black eyes. Her smile faded and brows pointed straight down in anger. Victoria grabbed the front of my shirt and lifted me like a doll into the air, then threw me into the nearest tree.

"ANSWER ME!" she commanded. I felt the pain, but it wouldn't travel to my voice. I'm almost positive my arm was broken along with something else.  
"Lie," a velvet voice told me to do.  
"H-h-his family and him went hunting out of town. They'll be back any minute!" My words trembled. The fear was so overwhelming all I could do was shake like a scared puppy. She didn't seem to like my answer.  
"LIAR!" Victoria screamed. Her foot came smashing down on my right leg. This time I couldn't hold it back. My scream echoed through the entire meadow as Victoria smiled successfully. The sickening snap encouraged the black-eyed monster even more.  
"Aw, did that hurt? You see _Bella_," She sneered at my name. "I don't like to be lied to. I stopped by the Cullen house before I found you. Their smell is old, barely even there. Meaning they've been gone for a while." She laughed wickedly, dancing around my crumpled body.  
" Left little bellsie all alone! Did Edward finally grow tired of you?" I winced at his name. "Well seeing now that he won't care if your dead or not, I suppose this changes my plan. See, I was going to torture you, maybe call your boyfriend let him hear some of it, then kill you. Mate for mate, but I see how much pain he left you in. What better solution than for you to live with it for the rest of eternity." My brown eyes stared at her in terror.  
"_No-o-o_. Please just kill me!" I pleaded.  
"Oh, but that would be too easy. Well, I have places to go and people to see. So lets get this started." I begged, I pleaded, even though I knew she wouldn't stop or take mercy. She broke my legs, my arms. She clawed at them with her glass-like nails. After what seemed like hours of torture she stopped. Between my agonizing screams, I was telling everyone I loved them and that I was sorry in my head. I told Edward I loved him repeatedly.  
"Oh well aren't I the little artist. Just a couple more details and my work will be done." She licked her nails and stabbed them into the right side of my face. I couldn't scream anymore. The pain was too much. Every cell and nerve of my body screamed for death, _begged _for it. Her nails dragged down the side of my face cutting it wide open from my temple to cheek. Victoria then flipped me on my stomach, which made my broken limbs burn to a point where it felt like my body was filled with magma. She made a giant V with her nails and finger an inch deep into my back. From my left shoulder blade, my lower mid-back, and back up to my right shoulder. Lastly pulled my blood stained hair , exposing my neck. Venom was already beginning to spread from her cuts, making the magma pure burning hell.  
"Farwell Bella." She hissed sinking her teeth into my neck, then disappearing. The fire erupted. Thankfully I lost consciousness before I could hit the ground... But before I did I thought my one last thought.  
"I'm sorry Edward, I tried. Forgive me. I love you." Then the black dark hole welcomed me with open arms.

**(A/N) S**o what you think?!Please tell me I worked really hard, this is my first fanfiction so I'm ! I'll try to update soon!Sorry for all the grammar and spelling mistake.  
Love,  
Izabeth


	2. Chapter 2

(A/N) Hello readers! Omg I got 3 reviews! I know it doesn't seem like much but... When I saw people actually read my story, I just about pissed myself ^_^ Well lets see how chapter 2 goes!

Disclaimer- I do not own Twilight:( or Edward :"'(

Chapter 2 B.P.O.V

I woke up in a strange place. I was in this dead meadow covered in blood.  
"How did I get here?" I thought. But all I could remember was pain. Lots of it. A strange red head was attacking me. She was beautiful but terrifying. I flipped through all my memories of her torturing me. She had called me Bella. Hmm. I pondered that for a moment. I guess that's my name. I looked all around me and was shocked, I could see everything. I could see each leaf on a tree, bugs flying through the air, and I could even hear a river flowing nearby. There was also something else...A steady pounding of some type, like a heartbeat. Immediately I was zipping in between trees at an inhuman speed as I came to a clearing filled with deer. I pounced , landing on the biggest. I broke it's neck and sunk my teeth into it's neck like butter. The warm red liquid flowed through my mouth, dampening that uncomfortable burn at the back of my throat.

After I had finished 3 more, I was appalled. What was I?! How could I do all these things?

Just then I was knocked flat on my back with an unbelievable pain in my head. I screamed at the top of my lungs when I was pulled into a type of vision. My eyesight blacked out. I Couldn't see anything. I could just hear these voices.

"Go on," the velvet voice said.  
"About vampires." Wait a minute,is that me? It feels like I've said that was I talking to?  
I was barely catching any of the whispers, they were moving around too fast. Then the voice changed. It was low, but friendly. Sounded like it was trying to be scary.  
"They claimed that they didn't hunt humans. They supposedly were somehow able to prey on animals instead. Blood drinkers. Your people call them vampires."  
The voices stopped. So that's what I was! A vampire. But I thought they didn't exist! Now I know why the red head bit me. But why did she turn me? What did I ever to do her anyways? Why me? I sighed. I guess I won't know unless another memory like that hits me again.

I slowly opened my eyes to see the sun shining right on me. Something was sparkling. Wait..vampire..sun..Oh shit! I ran for the cover of the nearest set of trees. I was gasping for breath. How come it didn't burn me? I slowly stuck out my hand into the sun. I sparkled. Well, I didn't see that coming. I wonder how many other myths aren't true? My eyes darted around,where am I going to stay? Again, I was almost knocked over from the pain in my head, I gripped it and sank to my knees. My teeth clamped together as I tried not to scream again.  
" Volterra,Italy.." The voice said.  
Well I guess that answers that question. These voices are creepy though. Is this normal for a vampire or am I just insane. I shook my head and started running. Whatever was in Italy may hold some answers. I still wasn't sure though. Why Italy? Where even was I? I decided to wait for another memory but it didn't come...

I waited two whole weeks but I didn't have another episode. I fed, slept, and waited. Yup. I could sleep without a coffin. I found out other things to. Like my speed, I couldn't get hurt by sun, and I was super strong. I wandered by a nearby river deciding what to do. I argued with myself, and waited, and paced. But there was no other option. I still didn't know who I was or what happened to me. And I sure as hell can't go talk to humans. I sighed as I made my decision. I was going to Italy...

After only two days I made it there . I stopped only to feed, sleep , and stole some clothes from a Kohls in Indiana. I was careful to avoid humans. Surprisingly I came across ones sent and it smelled absolutely disgusting. If there were other vampires ,I don't know how they stomached the stuff. During the journey I found I could control some elements, like air and water. While I was swimming, whatever way I wanted the water or air to move it did. Freaked me out a little at first,when at a flick of a wrist the water and air started moving like crazy. This was weird. I never heard about a vampire who could do that.  
I had finally made it to Volterra. But to be honest now that I was here I had know idea what to do. The sky was getting dark so it was safe for me to come out without resembling a disco ball. I roamed the streets and alleyways ,smiling at the people I passed. I was passing a little shop when my mouth dropped. I was as beautiful as the redhead...I had curves in all the right places, my hair was in glistening mahoganycurls down to my waist. Any roundness in my face I may of had was now gone. Features were sharp and angular. My lips were blood red, I rolled my eyes at the irony. My eyes were brown with streaks of orange and gold in them, framed by dark lashes. I can't believe I hadn't seen my reflection before.  
"Wow..." I thought.

I pulled myself away from the mirror understanding now why all the humans kept looking at me funny. Ha! I was looking at me funny. I walked some more looking up and down the streets for something I might remember. Then a sweet smell entered my nose. Instincts kicked in and I crouched down with a growl vibrating in my chest. That's when I came face to face with a pair of dark red eyes. (A/N) I was going to stop it right there. But ima keep going and be nice.:))

The growl continued to rumble in my chest before I realized what I was doing. These people might be able to help me. I stood up and lost the growl, much to the surprise of the big vampire. I guess he was expecting me to put up a fight.  
"Hello," he said with a creepy smile.  
"Hello," I replied. Just then another vampire shot up by his side.  
"What do you have here Demetri?" He asked playfully.  
"Not sure, I was fixing to find out." Who I'm guessing is Demetri answered. I figured they were wanting me to speak now.  
"Hello, my name is Bella. I woke up alone after my change , and I was wondering if you could help me?" I asked being as polite as I could be.  
"What do you need help with?" The nameless vampire questioned. I was trying to think.  
"I'm not exactly sure," I mumbled.  
"I think we better take her to Aro, Felix." He whispered .and the other nodded. So that's what the nameless vampires name was!  
Felix was a good foot taller than me and heavy built. He had black hair that framed his face in waves and his eyes were very dark with just a hint of red. around the irises. Demetri on the other hand was just a little bit shorter than Felix, but still had a LOT of muscle. His hair was just a shade lighter than Felix's , but down past his ears, and his eyes were the same color as the other vampires. Both were pale, they could be brothers. And both were in these midnight black cloaks that gave them a Dracula vibe.  
" This way Bella." Felix said gesturing for me to follow. I did as I was told. I followed as they weaved in and out of streets and alleyways . It was early so shops and windows still glowed a warm golden color. We came to a pitch black alley that curved downward as we walked.

"Hmm, perfect night for a stroll isn't it?" Felix said. Then he faked a yawn and tried to put his arm around me. I slunk away wondering whether I should run or not. Demetri rolled his eyes then looked back at me.  
"Don't worry he's just being stupid like always." I couldn't help but laugh a little at this. Felix gave him a death glare. They acted like brothers to. At the end of the alley was a dead end. But before I could even ask Felix dropped through drain. Demetri eye motioned for me to follow. I shakely sat down on the side before I dropped my body into darkness. I was expecting me to land and break an ankle or something , but instead it was just like taking a step down a stair. Something else I needed to add to what I knew about vampires. I kept myself stiff with my hands folded across my chest. Ready if they decided to attack.  
At the bottom it was dim and not black as I expected. A small lamp was placed about every ten feet giving it an eerie haunted house feeling. I was beyond nervous. I kept thinking how stupid it was I came here. For all I know these people may of hated me in my human life and that's the only reason I remember. My lungs were quickly taking and letting out unnecessary air. Felix looked back and smirked. I swear he was getting on my nerves. My breath caught as we came to a pair of dark brown doors. Felix walked through first, followed by me, then Demetri. Putting me in between them. I stepped into a dim hallway. The walls were an off-white, the floor carpeted in industrial gray. Grand chandeliers were hung every so often which shone brightly. It was warm, which felt nice to my granite skin. It was a complete switch from the dark,damp, sewer we just came out of. Vampires were all over. Looking at me, whispering, and staring.

Felix and Demetri kept eyeing me, I couldn't quite tell why though. Another vampire passed with dirty blonde hair. He looked young, with full lips and reddish was in the same black cloak as Demetri and Felix. I stood out like a sore thumb.  
"What do you have here?"His smooth voice asked, staring me down.  
"We are going to need Aro in the throne one seems different."Felix answered nodding towards me. What was he talking about? My eyes? Whose Aro.  
"I will go get him," the boy nodded then blurred lightly tapped my back to keep moving.  
We got in an elevator ,it started going down. Classical music was playing as I tried not to fall asleep. Demetri looked at me funny. Wasn't he a little tired to?  
The silver doors opened into what would be a reception area but was now empty. Empty vases were on tables near the sitting area and strange paintings hung on the walls. After passing through even more doors and hallways we came to the biggest of them all. It was dark polished wood with gold weaving in the curly designs. I could barely hear talking on the other side as Felix opened the doors...

(A/N) Questions, questions and more questions for Bella. I'm already typing chapter 3. Good? Bad? Anything you would like to see or know about? :( :) Let me know. Sorry for any review! I'm trying:P I won't update till I get 5 reviews!  
Love,  
Izzyyyyy:D


	3. Chapter 3

(A/N) I'M SO SORRY! I did not mean to wait this long to update! At first I was waiting for more reviews, but before I knew it I got caught up with school work and I was at the Dr getting tests done! So sorry I feel so bad. You are allowed to slap me. I already smacked myself. Also so sorry I forgot to mention when Bella saw herself, she has a scar from her right temple to mid cheek that Victoria gave her. It didn't heal and it's a pinkish, silver color. I need some help with how long Bella should stay in Italy? I'm thinking at least a year or two but 10 or under?Also not sure if you guys would want any other p.o.v.s? Well here goes my attempt at chapter 3!

Disclaimer- I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. Otherwise Bella would trip over dirt less often.

Chapter 3. Still B.P.O.V  
I stepped into a magnificent room. It was entirely made of white polished marble, with a glass dome shaped ceiling. Portraits hung all around the room of people. My eyes stopped when they met one of three older vampires and a young one. He was blonde and tall in very outdated clothing. This must of been painted a while ago. But what was funny about him is that he had gold eyes. I felt like I knew him from somewhere. I shook it off and returned my attention to the front of the room. There were three thrones there. All very large and made out of dark colored fabric, with crystals imbedded in the head and gold on the legs and arms.I put two and two together and assumed they must belong to the three men in the painting. But where was the blonde vampire?

Just then one of them entered the room fro behind a dark red velvet curtain that rested behind the thrones, then the other two came out. The first seemed to of been changed when he was older, around 40. Even for his age he was still beautiful. His skin was very thin for a vampire , like paper. Long black hair was combed back and landed right at his shoulders. His face was very me somewhat a bird. He took a seat in the chair in the center. Guess he must be the head sparrow.  
Next was a much younger looking one. He resembled a child but looked to be about 25-30ish. His hair was an inch or two longer than the other and it was white blonde. His face was in a scowl. I couldn't tell if he was scowling or if that was just his sat down on the right throne. Last was a taller vampire, appeared to be older to, around 50. His hair was black and down to his shoulders, parted in the middle instead of streaked back like the other two. It also fell in waves. He looked at me in a puzzled way then smiled. I smiled back to telling I liked him already. When he smiled I heard most of the vampires gasp which puzzled me. He sat down in the last chair on the left. Looking at them I felt like I had disturbed royalty. Suddenly the middle vampire broke the silence in such a way I literally jumped.

"Well! Isn't this exciting! I would usually be mad for the guards disturbing me at this hour, but aren't you something!" He exclaimed in a very energetic voice. He kept looking at me so I gave a sheepish smile., not sure what to say. His smile faded but not in a bad way.  
"Oh yes my dear, you must be so very confused. My name is see I have a power to see into people's minds with just a touch. Hear their thoughts and see their pasts. Would you mind if I held your hand?" He asked and was already in front of me.I looked at all the people around me. None of them said or did anything until I got to Demetri. He nodded his head for me to continue. I gulped and held my hand out. I either hope he doesn't hear what I said about him being head sparrow, or has a sense of humor. He closed his eyes and took my hand. It was only seconds , but it felt like hours. When he opened his eyes again he frowned but his eyes were burning with interest.  
"Oh crap," I thought. "He heard what I thought and now he's to make a first impression Bella." I mentally kicked myself.  
"How strange, I can't see anything. It's just blank." I didn't have to turn around to knoe about half of the vampires jaws dropped. They need to get out more often.

"Well considering I can't see anything miss-"  
"Bella," I answered but it sounded more like a question. This sparked an interest in Aro to.  
"Yes, Miss Bella. Please tell us about yourself and why you're here."He mused. I bit my lip trying to concentrate. A couple of vampires leaned in.  
"I'm not sure where to start." I admitted.  
"Demetri mentioned something about you needing help. Start with that." Aro said as he took his seat again. I felt like I was on trial.  
"Well, umm, You see I can't remember anything from when I woke up. I wandered around and the place Volterra popped into my mind. So, I decided to come here. I really don't know anything about vampires or what I'm supposed to do or..." I trailed off.  
"Hmm that's like someone has broken the law leaving a newborn unattended. Do you know when you were changed? Or who changed you dear one?"  
"I-I remember this women with thick red hair, like fire. She tortured me and bit me. I only remember my name is because she called me Bella. But after that I'm not sure.."I frowned not allowing to break down. I don't remember much but I do remember the pain of every second she tortured me. Just then Felix spoke up.  
"I wonder if it's that red head who has been causing us trouble lately." He mentioned with a frown.

"I think so.. You look so young. Wonder why she choose you to put through all that. Did she give you that scar dear one?" Aro asked. I nodded as a stray tear slipped down my everyone gasped. I was getting really tired of it.  
"She can cry Aro." The dirty blonde vampire gasped.  
"I see. How odd. You really are unique. Do you know what's wrong with your eyes? Or anything else you can do?" Aro resembled a child on Christmas asking me these questions.  
"Well I can run fast-" I started before the blonde cut me off.  
"All vampires have super strength, can run fast, need blood, and shine in the sun. We also do not age." He said with a scowl. We don't age! Wow.  
"Oh, well, um. My eyes are a different color, I drink animal blood, I can cry and sleep. Umm you can't hear me. And I can control water and air." When I said that last one Aro was practically jumping in his seat.

"You must be a shield!" he exclaimed. "Jane dearest, would you so kindly try your power on Bella?" The other black haired vampire got tense in his seat, and so did everyone else. What was her power? I turned my attention to a small whitish blonde haired girl. She looked like the dirty blonde boy with her features and full lips. Her brows were furrowed as she gave me a death glare. I waited for something to happen, but Aro just clapped his hands.  
"How terrific! You can stop now Jane dear." He waved his hand at her. "Now what were the other two? You can control air and water?" If his smile got any bigger he would break his face.  
"Yes, would you like me to demonstrate?"I asked. He waved his hands for me to continue. I lifted my hand and focused on the water in a flower vase in the corner. The water rose into the air and I moved it around my head. Along with that I sent a gush of wind throughout the whole room.

When I was done I put the water back where it belonged. Aro looked exactly like the mad hatter in his throne.  
"Marvelous!" He exclaimed. The sudden use of power completely drained me as the floor came closer. Demetri grabbed my arm before I hit the ground.  
"Thank you." I mumbled as I regained balance. He nodded and went back to his place against the wall.  
"Oh how silly of me! You sleep you must be tired. Where did you say you traveled from?"  
"Washington, U.S.A." I responded.  
"Oh yes, a very long way. Would you like to stay here with us? We can be your family and teach you, maybe even help you remember." Now it was my turn to gasp. I just walked in and they were going to let me live with them?! I was so happy all I could do was nod.  
"Splendid! Now you may stay in-" Aro was cut off when The black haired man got up and walked over to his brother. Arm outstretched. Aro took the hand and closed his eyes,  
When he opened them he simply nodded and the other vampire went to go sit back down.

"You will stay in the room down the hall from Marcus and Didyme . Is that alright with you?" He said gesturing to the black haired vampire , Marcus. I smiled and nodded. He was the one I first trusted once I came here. ((A/N)Didyme is alive in my story)  
" Well, I can see young Bella is tired. And this has been quite a night. Alec, please show Bella to her new room. She can greet everyone in the morning."With that he got up and walked off.  
"Thank you so mu-"  
"It is fine dear one. I hope you like it here." Aro disappeared out the curtain, followed by the blonde, and then Marcus with a smile. I waved goodnight as Alec(Dirty blonde) came up and tapped my shoulder with a smile.  
"I'll show you to your room," he murmured. We walked back to the doors with his hand on my back. I should be wondering am I sure I could trust these people. Maybe it's vampire instinct, maybe it's something else. But I felt these people I could trust. I stepped back through the doors and was led upstairs to a separate hallway. I fell asleep that might in a pale, blank room. They said I could decorate it anyway I wanted when I felt better. As I drifted into peaceful sleep, I felt I was starting a brand new, good life.

(A/N) Again sorry for any mistakes! Hope you liked it! If you have any questions , ask me! Review pretty please ! *gets on knees and begs* Tell me if you want any different P.O.V.s! Sorry for any mistakes. PLEASE REVIEW! I KNOW A LOT OF YOU HAVE READ MY STORY BUT AREN'T REVIEWING:(  
Love,  
Izzie ^_3


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